Dear Phone…Let’s talk about my anxiety

Dear Phone,

I hope all if well with you. Since we are going there with all this relationship, I thought I would share demon from the closet….and no, it wasn’t that closet. We are going to talk about my dealing with anxiety.

I have a slight issue with anxiety. I tend to over worry about everything. I worry about things I have done and the possible consequences that can occur. It can also just be over worrying about things I haven’t done before. It never has been bad like it is right now.

When I worked in retail, it was common knowledge that my supervisor didn’t like me. They would take anything I did wrong, from the nonexistent things to the mistakes that I made, and try to get me fired and out of their hair. This extra stress really messed with me to the point where it made my anxiety get even worst.

People don’t really talk about anxiety that much. And when you think about how it’s presented in society, it’s presented in a way that people just think you are crazy. Anxiety is different for everyone. My anxiety is just me over worrying to the point that it’s all I think about. I’ve only been sent into a panic attack once. I also get very jittery at times when it’s starting to show.

Once I realized that I have bad anxiety, I started to realize when it is my anxiety. Like when I’m over worrying and it is just my anxiety I can sometimes talk myself out it. Sometimes I just let it run it’s course, especially if it’s something that I can’t talk myself out of it. I once sent myself into an anxiety attack because I was single. I was stressing myself over finding a boyfriend.

I sent myself into an anxiety yesterday about driving. My anxiety kicks in majorly when it comes to driving, more so when it comes to driving to places I never been before. I also get big anxiety when it comes to opening up. I have anxiety sharing this with you. People look at and treat you weird when you share things like this.

I wish more people would be more open to talking about things like this. If we stop shoving it under the rug then it would help so many people. Anxiety is something that everyone has, it’s just mine shows itself a little differently. It’s really not that big of a deal until it begins to take over your life.

I decided a long time ago that it wasn’t going to take over my life. So far, it really hasn’t. I also decided that I’m going to make more time for me and what I want to do. It’s a way that I use to take my mind off it and calm it down. Also, working out does that too. Either way, I have anxiety and it’s just something you are going to accept about me 🙂

Yours Truly,

Steven Kaufman

P.S. Since we are now dating, make sure you follow me on Twitter and Instagram. I’m like the social media mogul version of Tinkerbell. Just instead of people believing I exist, I need those follows to live

 

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